Life in Lockdown - finding the little joys [1:0]</strong>
Imagine for a moment that we are sitting in a room together (socially distanced of course) it’s just you and me.
So, How are you feeling? Are you okay?
How has life in lockdown treated you?
Early studies have found that we are on the cliff of a mental health crisis due to the impact of the lockdowns and the uncertainty of COVID-19. It is believed that one of the negative legacies of the lockdown will be the impact on peoples wellbeing and mental health regardless of their age.
Lifeline cites that ‘The outbreak of coronavirus COVID-19 has impacted people in varying ways on an international scale. It is understandable that during times like this, people may be feeling afraid, worried, anxious and overwhelmed by the constantly changing alerts and media coverage regarding the spread of the virus.’
These emotions symbolise the inane human need to adequately understand a situation. In a way it is not too dissimilar to the stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Often these are felt in no particular order but viewing the current situation from this prism is a good way of reflecting on where we are at.
As the weeks have passed I have tried hard to keep check on my wellbeing. It’s not been easy. The first skill I had to learn was to turn off from the bombardment of negative news and social media.
This project has been the best thing I could have chosen to work on. It has provided connection, and purpose while staying connected with a community I am involved. If anyone would have asked me a year ago whether we be social distancing and wearing a mask you would have laughed at them and called them crazy. These are indeed strange times.
Little pleasures, simple joys
I am sure you have seen the instagram stories filled with an avalanche of Bread Baking, Pasta making, a discovery of jigsaw puzzles, painting and music and of course plenty of physical fitness activities. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle, Staying positive and accessing support are all elements which are important when keeping check on your mental health. We all do this differently. Finding ways of accessing support is the key to surviving challenging times.
One of the things I’ve noticed is that I have developed a whole new appreciation for the little joys in life. The Stay at Home order is now firmly in place. Coping in isolation has meant different things for different people.
The tools developed during lockdown may for some people become the blueprint for coping with all that life throws at us from here forward. Let’s be honest our lives are sometimes unnecessarily busy.
This post on instagram (see left image) from Bryan Robertson appeared in my instagram feed while I was immersed in this project. The sentiments contained within the post spoke to the issues some people were feeling. They were raw and yet hopeful. Speaking about mental health is never easy especially in such a public way. The one thing it has reminded me of was that as humans we need a purpose and a way to stay positive. But most importantly we need to be open to communicating our feelings.
I asked Bryan about this post and what he has learnt about himself during this period. He replied;
‘I realised that when I took a day off and I didn’t feel better that I needed to focus on something else.’
Bryan continues ‘It's funny, I've got hobbies, right? Three different hobbies. I really like cooking. So smoking meats on barbecue, watches. It's kind of like the engineering and artistic aspect combined.
Everyone say’s It's my nerdy brain and whiskey as well. So, whiskey can get pretty dangerous if you drink too much. So, I really focused on the cooking and the watches. I would go to my watch maker, and I've got a couple of old watches lying around, I'd speak to him about it. I've watched some YouTube videos and learn more about the engineering behind these things and to fulfil my passions.’
It seems that in times of confusion we settle for controlling the controllable and focusing on things that are sometimes the polar opposite to our normal routine. Alessandro Arbizzani (Referee Assessor) turned to colouring books as a form of switching off from the demands of work and all the uncertainty for his family in Italy. Whilst also occupying his time with cooking and walking the dog.
It was not until he began to pursue colouring as an activity did he find some balance. He picked up colouring as a distraction from what was happening in the world around him and as a way of coping. ‘I would always be online with my normal job or Ref Coach podcast side project. I had the realisation I was working way too much. My wife being a nurse and at University during the week meant I was always at the computer and often home alone. I just thought that wasn’t good for me. So, what can I do to get my mind off things.
I’m not big on meditation. so, I thought what could get me to turn the switch off now and then. I’m a creative person so I thought colouring and that turned out to be a good decision. I enjoy it very much and thats my off time. Sometimes I start colouring after lunch and all of a sudden three hours later I’m still doing it.’
As Alessandro recalls ‘it wasn’t until some friends asked me if I am working too much, are you stressed? Are you okay? did I realise that I’m fine because I have my down time and I’ve found a way to switch off from anything technological and just get back to a very manual thing that helps me reconnect to who I am and where I’ve come from. It reminds me of my time spent in creative industries doing creative work and my enjoyment for creativity when I was at kid. It really helps me to stay sane.’
Developing a sense of purpose is very much a way of coping in times of disruption. After all when you are used to having a structured life it’s hard to maintain a sense of purpose when everything has been up ended around you. Mouad Zwed [Mo] plays for Kingston City, and is well known behind the console playing e sports for Melbourne Victory.
Juggling a full time job, e Sports and playing for Kingston means that routine is very much a part of his life. ‘I always have my gear ready a few days before the kickoff. Mentally, I prepare myself. The night before. I get into my daily routine, what I eat, the night before the game and on the day.’ So suddenly his weekly routine which included work, football training and maybe a couple of hours of FIFA was no longer there.
The lockdown and the disruption of the routine meant that for Mo the challenges were experienced mentally rather than physically ‘it was mentally challenging at the start, the 2 hours of FIFA turned into 10 hours a day.’ (laughs) I live by myself, so most of my daily routine involves talking to my mates online, play station, party chats. It kind of never changed much so that’s what helped me mentally deal with the quarantine. Because that’s what I used to do most nights.’
‘It was mentally challenging at the start, but you know we are all human and we all adapt to whatever situation we’re put in.’ Mouad Zwed
Along with keeping up with his physical fitness program provided by the physio at Kingston, Mo spent time competing in an e Sports competition for Melbourne Victory. Mo talks about e sports and the excitement of playing during the lockdown in the below video.
Challenges in the everyday
Time in lockdown has been used many different ways by all the participants in this story. Catherine Zimmerman (Calder United) has found herself focusing on re-reading the Harry Potter series and surprisingly returning to playing the Piano. An activity which as she describe it was forced onto her and her brother as a child. For it to years later be something that she turns too is something she is thankful for ‘It’s kinda come back to me a little bit I’m definitely not a pro or anything but it’s fun to mess around and play some songs. When you can get a song down, like anything it’s rewarding and you pat yourself on the back.
The distractions from life during COVID-19 serve as a way of protecting yourself from what is happening in the world. The bombardment of information will inevitably take a toll on anyone. It has been a mentally exhausting period for most of us. As Catherine recalls;
‘Sometimes I watch the news. But sometimes when you watch the news it’s bad for your mental health because everything is negative. So, I’ll try and watch the news and stay updated on what’s happening back at home. I talk to my parents and friends back home.
But mentally, I think for anyone you get into those lows and think to your self when is this going to end and thinking what am I doing with my life. I’ve definitely had a couple of those. One night I cried just talking to my parents. I had no reason to be crying but I was emotionally and mentally over it.
doing nothing, doing the same thing everyday and not being able to play soccer. Which is ultimately the biggest downfall of all of it.’
The lockdown experience Aden Gardiner (Bentleigh Greens) and Robert Stambolziev (Preston Lions) has been an opportunity to focus on recovering from injury. For any athlete recovery from an injury no matter the severity means that you will experience time away from the game, time away from training with the group and a period of disconnect and to a degree isolation. So, weirdly the advantage of all this forced downtime is that it allows a rare opportunity to focus on getting the body right without the pressure to return to play when you may not be quite 100%.
At the time of the initial lockdown Aden Gardner from Bentleigh Greens was on the long term injury list after breaking his leg in the Pre-season Community Shield match against Hume City. The Newcastle native remained in Melbourne working part-time in Football while in recovery. Once the competition was suspended Aden chose to go home for a week to visit family not knowing that he would soon find himself stranded there until mid-July. In a way this was a godsend but still a challenge.
‘So regarding recovery for myself, it was a good time to have three months in my hometown. Being in a familiar environment around my family and friends having a home gym because obviously gyms are closed. So, being in an environment that is familiar, I’m also at my most comfortable where we get my best recovery.’
At the end of the day, it is a blessing in disguise during this COVID-19 time having an injury like mine, because it was half the season that I was going to be out for. But it's all a mental game and it does take its toll. I think I've coped very well with not missing out on anything. Yes, I've missed five games and that was tough enough, but I think using the tools like a sport Psychologists or speaking with family, friends or even your team back in Melbourne when I was back in my hometown in Newcastle using those tools, that certainly helps you get through through those little phases.’
As we moved out of the first lockdown and preparations were in place for the resumption of the season Aden was working to this date to return to football after receiving the all clear from the physio. The decision by Bentleigh to pull the pin on the season meant that he was suddenly left without a club for what looked like a truncated 2020 season. ‘For me it was like a slap in the face.’
Aden does acknowledge that it forced him to reconsider his options. After training with other NPL clubs he decided that rather than go back to Newcastle he would stick it out in Victoria for the resumption of the season. Motivation is the biggest challenge during this time. Looking to the future ‘for myself personally Bentleigh is the best option for me and my future. So hopefully something can pan out for next year as well.’
Robert Stambolziev (Stambo) returned to his childhood club Preston Lions in 2020 after a career playing professionally overseas and most recently in Australia at Altona Magic. A pre-season injury meant that he has used his prior learning and knowledge as a professional to train at home.
Like a lot of people the challenge has focused on filling time. Stambo has focused on his physical fitness which has involved running, weights, boxing and circuit training. Though he jokes that ‘the only hard thing is you’re stuck at home and it’s an easy access to the fridge or the kitchen. But having the right mentality to say to yourself, hang on you might have to work harder to burn off those calories its kinda what you need to do. I’ve always had a healthy lifestyle and been into fitness.’
When you consider the importance of the connection with your community whether it is in football or everyday life to suddenly not have this leaves a hole that is hard to fill ‘being around your mates and socialising. It’s what we enjoy. The change room, the banter and all that. That’s been difficult’ The playing group at Preston is filled with experienced players as well as the next generation of young players. For Stambo the advantage of being one of the older heads in the squad means that he views his role as being a mentor to some of the younger squad members. The issue of mental health is certainly an issue rearing its ugly head right now. ‘I’m getting towards my 30’s and fortunately it’s not an issue for me but it’s made me see that you may need to look at others. I’ve kinda taken that role as being a listening ear to people with issues. So the physiological is important but the mental has become a major factor. So, it’s important to be approachable and to be there for someone and and hearing them out. Maybe, I can’t do anything personally but just being there for them is important.
I think that in all aspects of life you have a lot of highs and lows and thats just normal. It’s vital Not to get too down on the lows and not get too high on the highs. But I think a great way for anyone to try and get through these times is to better educate themselves on the side of mental health by reading, by studying because sometimes you won’t have people there to guide you through it but also there are people out there to guide you so try to find a way to try and get in touch to try and find those people and everyone would love to help if you are going through this stage.’
Time away from the game has been embraced as an opportunity too reset and take life a little easier for a while. It’s rare in life to have a period where the demands of modern living aren’t getting in the way of discovering parts of you that you had not necessarily focused on in the past. Margot Robinne (Bayside United) has actually loved the free time. 'I’ve been exercising 5 - 6 days a week, I’ve been cooking a lot and just been taking care of myself. I’ve been doing a lot of things that I never got to do before. When I’m playing I am training at night, so I don’t have time to read. There were a lot of books that were on the side and I would never read but I have the time. It’s nice. Psychologically, I can feel that I am way better. But at the same time you don’t see anyone you don’t go out. And I think that especially me watching mainly European news I put myself in a very strict lockdown compared to what it was here. So, now I am getting a little more of a social life. I am doing well I guess.’
I asked Margot what she learned about herself during this time; ‘That’s a very good question… take time, take care of myself a bit more. It was required. I’ve actually gained weight but not fat but muscle because I’m doing way more now than I’m usually doing. I don’t normally have the time.
I’m 29 now so its not like the beginning of my career. Its nice to have this time where you can take care of your self here (points to her head) but mainly with your body because they work together.
‘After I lost my job my father said to me you struggled. You lost your job because of COVID-19, but don’t put yourself in a situation where you would lose your confidence. Enjoy this time to do what you need to do. Do what you want to do and see how you feel. I started another job. I took this time to do what I want to do. It sound like a cliche to do exercise and cooking but I love that.’
The disruption of our routines is something that is a factor in the way people perceive the impact of COVID-19 and the lockdowns. For Matt Hennessey of Pascoe Vale, life during the first lockdown didn’t change too dramatically. ‘Unfortunately, golf got taken away. I'm not even that good of a golfer but I enjoy playing. But that got taken away with the restrictions as well. So, I tried to practice as much as I could, with the limitations in place, going for a lot more walks with my partner, and probably working a little bit longer hours, not crazily. And in all honesty, I think I’ve watch a lot of You Tube and Netflix, I've never actually properly been able to sit down and binge.
I’ve been trying to do as much running as I can, as per the program. Me and a group of mates have had a mother's Club, which we just video call and do some workouts.’
Matt’s lockdown experience coincided with work in the building industry getting busy which he is grateful for. Matt recalls that ‘The only thing that played on my mind is the amount of media attention COVID has received. Over the last two to three months I don't think I've had a real conversation with anyone that hasn't at least had a mention of COVID-19. It’s just a sign of the times, but that is probably the one factor that plays on you a little bit because you can't just have a general chitchat about general life because there's no real general life.
I think you hear so many different opinions that it becomes a bit overwhelming. I mean, you hear on one radio station, about the cases going up and then you hear on another one that restrictions are easing. There are so many different types of opinions in the media that at some point it was easier just to block it out than take on the stress of the mixed messages being reported.
Like Matt, Heidelberg United’s Steph Galea had to deal with the mixed emotions of dealing with a season that was over before it began. While she has still been able to work in her full time job during the lockdown she has adjusted her schedule due to the lifestyle changes forced by the COVID-19 lockdown.
‘I try to go for a run two days and then do ball work on the other day and we’ve been doing F45 zoom sessions as a team. Thats usually on the weekend. I’m spending a lot more time with my family which is really important to me. I don’t usually see them till after 10pm on a week night.’
Season 2020 was looking to be exciting for the team. Steph recalls that ‘we were a couple of days away from kicking off the season we had a massive pre-season we had some pretty good results. All the girls were buzzing, going into round one there was an amazing vibe and we get told we wouldn’t get to play or train or do anything. So it took a lot out of you.’
The Heidelberg squad is a young team with some of the girls in year twelve. As a leader in the group Seph believes it’s important for her to stay positive and in contact with the group.
‘I know some of the girls are struggling mentally with working and learning from home. Not having somewhere to go afterwards to get your mind off it all would be pretty heavy on you.’
Perhaps as a testament to the resilience of the group Steph recall how quickly things were put in place to ensure the lockdown would not be wasted;
‘As soon as we found out the bad news we were actioning plans on how we were going to treat isolation, how we were going to train, how we were gong to stay engaged and stuff like that. There were a lot of chat on social media about how we were going to stay active. That started straight away which was really good and credit to the Heidelberg girls. We’ve stayed United which is what we are about. Obviously not training together you're relying on everyone to take their own responsibility, to go out and train.’
Over the last four months I’ve often heard people say that it’s important to focus on the things within our control and to let the things out of our control go.
The need to search for a greater meaning and focusing on our wellbeing while finding a new purpose is all part of keeping positive and looking to the future.
Mental Health resources specific to COVID-19:-